How to plan a meaningful wedding day in less than a year

You said yes, congratulations! You and your significant other have a lot to plan and preparations to make if you’d like to get married in less than a year! It is very doable, can be affordable, and you can make it the meaningful day you always hoped for, without the stress and drama. Follow this outline of things to think about in five separate phases. 

Phase 1 – Things to Do with your Fiancé BEFORE doing any *official* planning

• What time of the year do you want to get married?
• Is there a special date for your relationship?
• Who do you want to have in your bridal party?
  • I recommend choosing an even number of people for each side, so then you and your spouse will always be in the middle for photos

• Who do you want on your guest list
  • Who is on each side of the family that needs to be invited and who should be invited
• What friends would you like to invite (remember to include the possibility of a plus one)
• What makes your relationship special/unique?
• Think about the times that have brought you the most joy in your relationship
  • For us, it was chocolate milk and donuts on the weekends, friendships, pizza, walks outside, communication, dates and traveling
• Where would you like to get married and have a reception?
  • Indoor, outdoor, church, elope? Is there a special town important to your relationship, etc.

• What would you like to eat at your reception?
  • Like I said before, chocolate milk and donuts were/are our jam! We HAD to have them at our wedding. So we got a giant donut to take bites out of, instead of a REALLY expensive cake. Then every year we buy FRESH donuts on our anniversary and share this meaningful, special sentiment to our relationship. AND we didn’t have to eat a gross, freezer-burnt cake the following year. 🙂
  • We wanted to have breakfast for dinner, however, because the time of the day and how the restaurant ran their food options the cost for this was definitely out of the question
  • We also made the menu simple so everyone would enjoy-burgers with the works. L-O-V-E-D it!
    • Coming from two beef farming families, this worked out well for us!
• What is a *rough* budget for what you’d like to spend on your wedding?
• Find out if your parents plan on paying for anything as a gift
  • My in-laws so graciously decided to pay for the suits for the guys (that they could keep, how cool is that!) and they paid for the rehearsal dinner
  • My parents paid for the venue deposit and the beer and wine for the reception
  • That means we were left to pay for most of the rest of the wedding and rehearsal

Phase 2 – Important Wedding Details to Book Right Away

• Venue for Wedding
  • Pastor/Officiant
• Venue for Reception
  • Catering
  • Bartender
• Photographer
• DJ

Phase 3 – Next Level of Wedding Details to Figure Out

• Wedding dress shopping. You’ll want to plan for at least six months if you need to order a dress in a different size. You’ll also likely need some time for alterations to be done
  • Identify who you think you’ll have fun shopping with, and who is important to have there?
    • Ex) Mom, sister, best friend, future in laws: mother, grandmother, sister, bridesmaids
  • What is your max budget for a wedding dress-remember to plan in your fee for alterations?
• Suits, tuxes, dress shirts. You’ll want to plan for at least six months to get suits in, and to have any alterations done.
  • Are you renting, buying?
  • Can you order ties, bow ties, suspenders, shoes from somewhere other than the tux company to save some money? (Probably)
• Bridesmaid dresses. You’ll want to plan on having at least six months for dresses to come in, and give time for your bridesmaids to get them altered
  • Are the bridesmaids paying for their own dress?
    • I had our bridesmaids pay for their own dress, but I found the dresses in the sizes that they needed. These actually aren’t actual bridesmaids dresses, they are from a company called Honey and Lace. I wanted them to get dresses they could actually use again. I ordered myself one too, and I wear it all of the time!
  • Do you want them to have matching colors, with different styles, completely matching, a dress from an actual bridal shop, or do you want to get a dress for them that they’ll actually wear again?
  • Are you providing matching jewelry?
    • I provided matching jewelry and an personalized engraved metal cup for their gifts for being part of our wedding
    • Remember to order/get things to complete YOUR look too: bracelet, earrings, necklace, hair piece, veil, and shoes

• Are you requiring them to wear a certain shoe?
  • Especially with long dresses I don’t think this is necessary, but you do what you would like! People have different feet, I wanted them to be comfortable in a black shoe of some sort.
• Flowers
  • What is your budget for flowers?
  • Are there flowers you really enjoy, and want to include in your bouquets?
  • What local florists are around? Plan a meeting with each of them to show them your ideas, share your budget and get an estimate.
    • Come with pictures of styles of bouquets, colors and types of flowers you like. 
  • Can you insert some artificial flowers to cut down on the cost?
    • I bet you cannot tell that about half of the flowers in the bouquets myself and my bridesmaids are holding are artificial! This cut down my cost of flowers by about 70% of what they were going to be for all real because I found the artificial flowers from a bridal consignment store and they cost a few dollars for all that I needed.
  • Look at second hand stores/second hand bridal stores for good deals on artificial flowers and other decoration items.
  • Some flowers, like Baby’s Breath and Eucalyptus can be ordered for cheaper from places like Sam’s Club, Costo, etc. 
• Hair and Makeup
  • Who all needs to have their hair done?
    • Bridesmaids, mom, mother in law, grandma, grandmother in law, personal attendant(s)
      • Do you need to have someone do hair? Can each person do their own? 
    • Who is paying for hair to get done? You, bridesmaids, are you paying for half? Decide this prior to booking someone, AND let the people know in your wedding party what to expect for time and cost. 

• Do you want to get airbrushed makeup done? This is a bit more costly, and takes a bit more time, but the results look great! I also learned how to do my makeup, bought some quality product, practiced for a few months, and did my own wedding makeup! I think it looked great! Do you want someone to do people’s makeup? Again, keep everyone in the loop on what you expect. 
  • I ordered artificial lashes from Red Aspen! They’ve been through several weddings, and I still use them on occasion! 
  • Who is paying for this? 
• Do you want a special vehicle that you don’t own?
  • In our case I wanted to find my husband’s favorite car to surprise him for the day. I had to call and check with people for several months to find just what I wanted and line up the details!

Phase 4 – The Wedding Details that Take Some Time and Searching to Find & Get Just Right

• Wedding verses/readings and marriage prep counseling
  • Make a plan to meet with your pastor, or another couple that is further along in their faith journey to provide guidance and mentorship for you and your future spouse to create a firm foundation to start your marriage on. 
  • Identify how many readings or verses you and your pastor would like to have at your ceremony, and pick out those things together

• Wedding Cake….or something else
  • We opted for no cake. We went for donuts and chocolate milk!! Donut order had to be in three to four weeks ahead of time
    • Our local Hy-Vee bakery made our large 12” donut, and we ordered cake donuts from our local Casey’s
      • We also rented this simple tower for a $12 refundable deposit as long is it was all returned. A lot of bakeries have similar set ups. Just ask and see what is available, rather than buying it!
• Table Decorations
  • What is your budget for this? 
  • What look are you going for? 
  • Scavenge the online Facebook wedding for sale groups and check often for new listings
  • Check second hand stores/thrift store frequently for items
  • What can you borrow from people you know? 
  • Most of the time only battery operated lights are an option for venues, not actual candles. Make sure you are operating within the venue’s rules before buying decorations! 
• Save the Dates
  • Not necessary in my opinion. Save the money and invite people on a Private Facebook Group to let people know when the date of your wedding is. 
  • We have had other friends make refrigerator magnets, cards, and more. 
• Invitations
  • Photo Affections
  • Snapfish
  • Canva
  • TheKnot
    • You might consider using a bit.ly link to however you want to gather RSVP’s, or use a QR code on the back of your invitations.

• Honeymoon
  • Are you going to take a honeymoon right away after your ceremony and reception?
    • In my opinion, it was important to have a little down time after the wedding and reception, to celebrate the moment and not rush off, leaving family and friends to clean up from our big day 
    • It really was a lot of fun to get together with family the morning after the wedding and reception to open cards and presents and to just relax and enjoy being newlyweds 
  • Are you going out of the country, you’ll want to think about getting your passport sooner rather than later

• Unity Ceremony
  • We didn’t want this to be like everyone else’s wedding. We wanted this to be unique to us. We opted for a planting ceremony for our unity portion of the ceremony. We had both sets of our parents bring a quart sized, clear mason jar to the wedding. We used those to pour into our giant terracotta pot with a rose bush. We already knew where we would be living, but I wanted the plant to be something we could easily dig up part of if we decided to move. Hence, the rose bush, instead of a tree.
    • On our one year anniversary my husband bought me a cute planting kit that contained an acorn which could be grown out into an oak tree. (I killed it, but it really was the thought that counted with this one!) We went out and bought a full-sized oak tree for our property since the little acorn didn’t turn out to be so mighty 😉
• Songs for different parts of your ceremony and reception
  • Ceremony
    • Prelude (music)-plan for about an hour of songs
      • Hallelujah – Instrumental (Cover) | Piano Violin Cello

• Grandparents
• Mother of the Bride

• Enter Wedding Party-3.5 minutes for four couples, and the parents of the groom:
  • Secrets-Dallas String Quartet 
• Bride and Dad Walking Down the Aisle: 
  • Perfect-Ed Sheeran-violin cover by Andre Soueid 
• Rose Bush Planting + Marriage license signing  
  • Like Red on a Rose -Alan Jackson

Other song options that we had for back ups:

• All of Me-John Legend-instrumental Piano cover 
• Home by the Piano Guys 
• Can’t help falling in love-Vitamin String Quartet  
• Wonderful tonight -Eric Clapton   
• Crazy Love -Michael Buble 
• When I Say I Do -Matthew West (for signing the marriage license)
• Forever Love by Francesca Battistelli 

Phase 5 -The Wedding Details to wrap up all of the planning (but are pretty straight forward)

• Wedding Registry
  • We registered at Menards, Target and Amazon
    • That being said, I wish (and maybe there is an app like this now for weddings) there was an app like Babylist for weddings! Babylist allows you to put links from ALL of the places into your one registry
      • I’m going to make another post about the things we registered for that were a bit out of the ordinary, but we use the items all the time

• Guest Book
  • We had a guest book quilt. It is hung up in our basement, and it is one of my favorite things to look at!
    • My mom made the quilt, and we love it! We picked out a design together and I picked out fabrics for it. I picked fabrics in Iowa State colors, white/lace fabric to match how my dress looked, and the gray color that the guys suits were, and black.

• Wedding bands for bride and groom
  • Are you going to both have wedding bands?
    • I didn’t add a wedding band to my ring, and I’m happy with it! 
    • We ordered a wedding band for my husband
  • We also took a minute to order some silicone wedding rings for working out, working with our hands, working in the dirt, or working with power tools, etc.
  • We kept this simple, and agreed on an amount well in advance
    • We got each other engraved tumblers, still use them to this day!
• Gift and/or special note for your future spouse
  • A note doesn’t cost you anything, and it’s so special to read before meeting up with your future spouse before you wedding! My husband keeps his in the visor of his truck (I don’t think he knows that I know that 😉 )

• Apply for your marriage license (at least THREE DAYS PRIOR to the Wedding)-every county and state likely does this a bit differently, but here are things you’ll likely need (here’s the State of Iowa’s requirements):
  • Both parties going to get married have to be present
    • In front of a commissioned notary public
  • Two witnesses of legal age-present in person
  • Driver’s License 
  • Fee for printing ($35)
• Make a list of photos you would like to have your photographer take, and share them ahead of time. Check out this post, “Pictures you are going to want on your wedding day” for a great list, and rationale 
• Make a schedule of the day’s events and share it with everyone so they are on the same page
  • Stay tuned for another post about this soon!
• Bridal Showers and Bachelorette Party
  • I pray you have a community around you to support you and shower you with love at these events! Enjoy them, try to remember what you received from showers because each time you use that gift you will remember who gave it to you and it will be that much more special to you!

We’re so happy for you and your spouse in this next stage in life, congratulations! You can plan to get married in less than a year, you can have it be affordable, you can make it the meaningful day you always hoped for, without the stress and drama. I’m cheering you on! Please comment below what you’re wondering about, or if you’ve had a wedding, what you would add to this post. I strongly believe we can learn a lot from each other, and believe in the community of people wanting to help each other out.